snippets of conversations.

[passing a guy on the phone while absentmindedly boring his key into the concrete pillar]

V: what's he doing?
Me: he's a rugby player. maybe he hasn't realised that the pillar isn't actually a door, and he can't get in using his key.

[yesterday, at a house party, with random guy. in the kitchen, i'm having a look at their spice rack. i reach out for a bottle of mustard seeds to have a closer look.]

guy: are u trying to steal their mustard seeds?
me: [putting it back] no i'm not!
guy: yes you are! i'm going to tell on u!
me: if u do, i'm going to tell the ponytailed guy who runs the cd library not to hire you. i know u want to work there. and u told me where it was- i know where to find him! portland building, down the stairs, to the left, near the chapel. haha!
guy: [widens eyes] you remembered wrong. it's somewhere else.
me: [sarcastic] oh really? where?
guy: the sports hall.
me: the sports hall. right. portland building near the chapel.
guy: oh no. they moved the chapel to the sports hall too. cuz they found out that a lot of sports people are christians.
me: and the cd library?
guy: so they can listen to music when they exercise.
me: and pray at the same time.
guy: exactly.

[walking across campus, bump into someone from my hall.]

me: hey, going back for dinner?
guy: yeah, just back from ultimate frisbee. helps me get off my arse.
me: yeah. it's hard. there's always pizza around the hall. i had half a large pizza at 2am yesterday.
guy: yeah i know. it's so unhealthy. but i always ask for peppers on mine. bit of vegetables.
me: well, if it has peppers on it, it's practically a salad, isn't it?

[walking to get coffee, today]
me: i only have a pound left in my wallet.
L: u don't have any more money?
me: no. but i might get some on tuesday.
L: u can't live on a pound until tuesday! how are u going to go to oceana [a club] tomorrow with only a pound?
me: who says i'm going to oceana on tomorrow?
L: oh, didn't i tell u? u're going to oceana tomorrow.
me: oh.